I'M TOO EXCITED TO SLEEP!!!

Visions of sugar plums never danced in my head. As kid, I was way too excited to enter dreamland on Christmas Eve. My excited anticipation kept me from sleep for many many years while I waited for Santa to arrive. The night before our trip to Disney World, sleep never touched my eyes. Instead, I laid in bed, day dreaming at night of how wonderful the week would be. My parents often wouldn't tell me about planned events in the hope that I'd sleep through the night, knowing full well of my night time charades. Vividly I remember waking up to Jill's four year old giggles as she exclaimed, "Jessie! We're going to Astroworld today!!!!" For the life of me I couldn't understand why my parents kept this information a secret, but it was an awesome surprise and I'd actually slept the whole night through.

Last night I felt like like the same six year old girl, staring wide eyed at the ceiling in excitement.

But this time there was no logical, specific reason for my restlessness. There, under the covers, beneath the soft whirl of my fan, I concluded, "Holy Spirit, this must be you stirring inside of me!" It was a beautiful revelation, never have I felt so content in the Lord. No need for tossing or turning, I just laid still in the presence of my Father, completely thrilled at His perfect plan for my life. Hopes for my future that I'd been clinging to for so long, just seemed to effortlessly pass from my hands to his. Repeating through my mind were the words of Job, "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked will I depart. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised." No matter what He has in store for me, good or bad, I thought to myself how blessed I will be for eternity under the care and protection of Jesus Christ. The life I've been making so complicated, simplified instantly at this new perspective. He didn't need some life altering, climatic moment to change my heart. He simply moved.

Softly I whispered, "Lord, I surrender it all to you."

A smile remained on my face as I slowly fell asleep, my Father watching tenderly from Heaven.